top of page

Play & Stillness / episode 7 Show Notes

Updated: Mar 22, 2023


PLAY

Safe & Social + Flight & Fight = Play

  • Face to face signals safety

  • Shared attention - Focus on the same thing or common point of interest like a puzzle or soccer ball

  • Play is reciprocal and synchronous

  • Shared, safe and in same bodily State

  • Exercises the ability to shift up and down the ladder

  • Using mobility with safety

MOBILIZATION WITHOUT SAFETY

For traumatized individuals, play may activate the defense systems without the ability to co-regulate

  • Depends on their play history

  • “Doesn’t play well with others.”

  • Kids that push the limit of acceptable play

  • “Accidentally hurt someone”

  • Won’t have guilt (social engagement system isn't as available)

WHY IS MOBILIZATION UNSAFE?

Anything is unsafe without safety state

  • The State of flight and fight is used when things aren’t safe, but it needs the Safe & Social system to be active. Otherwise, it’s an increased heart rate

  • Environment becomes a threat without the safety to keep it in check

STILLNESS

Social Engagement + Shut Down = Stillness

  • Stillness without Fear, Sitting in silence, Self-reflection, Using the restroom, Intimacy with a partner, Sleeping

  • Traumatized people experience a body perception of danger when still

STILLNESS WITHOUT SAFETY

An inability to tolerate stillness/quiet for those down the ladder

  • Sitting still is unsafe

  • Classroom environment is unsafe: people, sounds, pressure, falling behind in class, feeling dumb, teacher comments/sarcasm

Meditation becomes unsafe

  • Closing eyes = dark, inward = danger, in a group especially

Sleep is unsafe

  • Anxiety feelings that lead to anxiety thoughts

  • About the next day or the previous day, something you didn’t do, panic about not falling asleep

  • Trauma memories, flashbacks and feelings

  • Plus darkness is a cue in itself of danger, also being alone

WHY IS STILLNESS UNSAFE?

Anything is unsafe without the social engagement system active

  • Being still means being open to a predator

“Story follows State”

  • Your thoughts and feelings will match the State you are in

COPING WITH STILLNESS

Sleep

  • Tv on, using a substance

Classroom

  • Behavior problems to avoid the stillness and unsafe feelings

  • Creating the external world to match the internal

  • Make the environment match the story which matches the state



Ask StucknautBot!

My custom AI is ready to chat with you. If you don't find the answer here, StucknautBot may be able to help!

bottom of page